The first time he and I were together it was because of a threesome with me, her, and him (they were still dating). I was really drunk that night and didn’t know any better; I was kind of mad at her for letting it happen.

Later on, they broke up, and he and I began hooking up. I thought I really liked him and he liked me and we had a future, but I just found out that he was just using me to add another notch on his belt.

Oh, and they took time off for a while from sex after they broke up, but apparently they’re sleeping together again.

I’m just confused and last night I was overwhelmed with guilt. Should I tell her what happened? I just don’t want a big dramatic scene, and I’ll understand if I lose her over this, but I don’t want her to tell everyone and lose other friends as well.

Please help me, my friend is graduating in four days and I don’t want this to stain our last week together.

Anyways…

I went over to see my friend at his house for some Friday night drinking and smoking and his sister answered the door. Ben had called to leave a message for me that he had to work late and wouldn’t be back for 3 hours. He asked that I hang with Meggin until he got back.

Meggin and I had a few beers and then smoked a giant blunt of some really epic shit. We got to talking about the attraction we’d always had for each other and one thing led to another and we started making out. Before I knew it we were ripping off each other’s clothes.

She went for my zipper and pulled out my cock and sucked on it like it was the last penis she was ever gonna see.I wanted to fuck Meggin, but didn’t want to disappoint my friend. My hard cock won out, of course, but before fucking her, I thought I’d return the favor by licking her pussy for awhile. She had a hot little ass and I slapped her cheek as I pulled down her panties and tried to maneuver my head in between her hot thighs. OH NO! What the fuck is that smell? I almost puked right then and fucking there. Her pussy stunk like a dead fish on the dock in August. It not only stunk. It really stunk. I had to turn my head away quickly because I could feel the chicken salad sandwich I had for lunch starting to come up my throat. “What’s the matter?”, she asked.
“Nothing”, I replied. I had to get out of there before the smell started burning the hair off of my body.

“Look, Meggin, I’m sorry, but all of a sudden I got a horrible toothache. I have to go. I’m sorry. Tell Ben I’ll catch him tomorrow,” I was zipped up and out of that house in 30 seconds.

Now I don’t know what to do.I haven’t called either of them and they haven’t called me. It’s been two days. I don’t want to lose my best friend, but there’s no way I’m ever going to be able to look at Meggin again.

I’m screwed.

Im happy, sad, angry, loving, caring, but most of all…im empty. I have been for very long and until recently it was getting better. From my first love and first lover, not feeling completely loved by my family and just recently finding out that my little sister is 7 months pregnant…and thats only the topping on this poisonous cake.

Family…i have so much to say about that one word. Its everything that i crave but everything that i’ve never had. I’m more scared than anything to experience it. I need to get over my abandonment issues but its not that easy.

Ooohhh i miss him so much but most of all i miss the friendship..the true friendship..I need a friend like him during this time…but maybe HE took him out of my life for a reason, so that i can develop into a strong woman…which is needed for a strong man. i will never forget you B. A.R. H. I am gratefull for everything that has happened between us and hopefully if im down in san jose i get to see u play football 1 day…….

i will take everything that i will learn from my past and everything that im experiencing presently and apply it to my future.

I think I’m becoming obessesed with him and I don’t know what to do to stop this obsession that is driving me insane and I know is not a healthy thing!!!! Every day, I check out his Facebook page to learn what he’s been up to, and I feel awful when I read that he is been involved in some activities on Facebook but that he didn’t contact me on that day.

I hate feeling this way, and I don’t know what to do to change this situation, but at the same time I don’t want to lose contact with him, because it means the world to me.

That’s how depraved I was. But one day in 2005 the Lord killed something within me in the middle of a masturbation session and I’ve never been the same. The realization that I was letting my hand determine where I would spend the rest of my eternity settled on me.

I turned from my sin and put my faith in Christ as the only Savior. I’ve been free ever since, and I now try to help guys that are addicted to porn and masturbation the best way I can.

Soli Deo Gloria, “All glory to God”.

Is this normal? I can’t imagine myself doing this to any other man, nor does him. Are there guys who do this?

I fucking hate you soooooo much!! i cannot believe that we every use to be friends. now the only people that like you are whores….just like you. they three of you are sluts. no wonder you guys hang out together. you’re such a dumb bitch! you have a fucking boyfriend! mannnn, i feel sooooo fucking sorry for him! you have him, so why do you still flirt with other guys?! oh yeah, its because you’re a whore. man, i dont know what eooeoie sees in you, or anyone as a matter of fact. i think that they only like you is because they know that you’re easy and you can give them what they want. you have no fucking idea how much i just want to punch you in your fucking face. also, you’re just like your sister. she two kids from different guys! WOW, thats you in the future.

I just want you to know that all the picutes that i have of you in my room, now have a fucking push pin in your ugly ass face. i wish that i could do that in real life. i hope after i get out of school, i NEVER hear from you again! i wish that i have never met you. ewwwww i fucking hate you. and stop flirting with people’s crushes. you’re soo stupid and i already know that you fucking do that shit to make peole mad, and thats why everyone fucking hates you. i guess all the guys want is a whore, and they fucking got it, and that you. so go off and keep doing that. i cant fucking wait until the day you ass gets pregant or a std. hahaha im gonna be laughing my ass of at you. man i HATE you.

The second problem is… I just don’t love him. I met really fantastic guy, but he live in another state… And… Does love at distance exist? Being in love means being together – right? It’s confusing.
Eeew. Pawel, I love you.

I am not really sure about my sexuality

I look at pictures and videos of him everyday for the past week or so… I wish he were in my real life… my real life is starting to feel so empty… I feel that he is my soulmate.

I am so much like him, but I am inward in my world whereas he is always performing…

I first met him a year and a half ago, and I loved him right away but tried to hide my feelings because I didn’t think anything could happen. But every time I see him, he is so happy to see me and we talk for hours. But he has never tried very hard to contact me, outside of a few emails.

I am afraid because he is a public figure that I am indulging my feelings and getting being a fan mixed up with being a lover or a friend, and that I will ruin things by feeling too much… but if I keep pretending I DON’T feel as much then nothing will happen between us.

Confused, in love or something in between obsession and angst-ridden love?

So, one day after I was settled at my new base, me and a friend decided to take a trip up to the other base. While shopping, I happened to run into my old Supevisor’s husband. We made the same small talk, only this time exchanged IM addresses. After I traveled back to my base, I added him to my IM.

One night about 3 months later, on another trip up yonder, I was at a club with a few friends. And there he was. Only this time things were much different. He was very flirtatious, a little touchy. He asked where I was staying and I told him. We left the club, I got my things from the hotel I was staying at, and we headed to his place. After arriving there, we listened to some music, was drinking on some cognac, and talking. Somewhere in between talking and listening to music, he started pulling me closer to him and telling me that he had always wanted me since the day he met me. He started kissing on my neck and my ears and then before I knew what was happening I was being led to his king sized bed.

The next morning, when my brain was clear from it’s drunken haze I thought about what I had just did. I thought it was just one of those drunk-night flings. But he woke up and we started going at it again.

I have taken a few other trips to his base to visit him. And while I always questioned myself as to what I was doing, I simply could not help myself.

Since both of us left Korea, he has IM’ed me out of the blue…telling me that he missed feeling my ass and tits and how he still thought about all the things we did to each other. All the while, I still keep in touch with his wife….his wife who wants to come visit me in Guam where I now am.

my family is so fucked up, and i feel like they hate me. my eldest brother *Abe* ignored me for like a year for no reason…like, i went to my brother *dan’s* house for a cook out and he was there, and he wouldnt even make eye contact with me, and he talked to everyone BUT me… then like 20 mins later he went to sleep… even now, i feel like crying cuz of it… i mean, do you know how that feels, im the youngest out of all my siblings (im 16 now, oldest sib. is 32) and when that happened i was only like 15, it hurt so bad, and he didnt even have a reason to do it… my mom said it was cuz the age diff. (hes like 25) but he was perfectly fine talking to my niece who is 11… and i have like 2 friends cuz no1 likes me, i never tell anyone how i feel, cuz i feel stupid and i dont even have a “best friend” and every friend i have always just leaves me, and treats me like shit, and i never stand up for myself… i hate it… and the person who used to be my best friendjust stopped talking to me, and she left me when i really needed her, …. u know how many times i have actually thought about suicide… more than i can count, i doubt id ever do it though.. i just feeling shitty all the time andhave no one there for me… i cant handle it… i dont know what to do…

and im not trying to make anyone feel bad for me or w/e i just wanted to tell someone even though they dont know me cuz i have never told anyone any of the way i feel and think.. ppl just see me as happy funny stupid acting jess, and they have NO idea about unhappy i actually am…
p.s- im not doing this to have ppl feel bad for me, and i tell u this cuz, even doing this, i feel stupid. =[

And during all this time I’ve been in love with another girl. Another girl that I knew in high school and until this very day, I am still in love with her. Her and I share everything, and I mean everything in common! I know she still has feelings for me as I do for her. But for some reason I cannot break up with my girlfriend. She’s a great girl now, super sweet and rarely ever asks for anything in return for her graciousness, but I feel like she’s just putting on a facade. She’s also brought out a side of me that I don’t even know.

And this other girl, well she is simply amazing. Everyone loves her, she’s everyones friend, and everytime we see each other, it’s like nothing’s changed- we always flirt back and forth in a sort of aggressive kind of way even in front of her boy. I just don’t know what to do. There’s so many factors in this… My best friends don’t even like my current girlfriend.. In fact… they hate her stinkin guts! I had a shot with this other girl before but I think I may have ruined that by now, haha, yeah ruined.

So ne wayz we sexored for 14 hours. at the end of it i was shitting out dickskin cause he must have rubbed off in me.

now i’m all aroused and i’m eating chocolate pretending i’m a girl outta 2 girls 1 cup.

Thats all i have to say about that

By Brad Innes.

Clark and I had a history a while ago, i fucked it up to say the least.
then he moved down the street into a duplex with his buddy.
we agreed not to date but he just can’t be my friend and my good time.
I’m too attached and I’d really like to be single for now, so I think I have to break it off.
problem: he’s the only guy to actually get me off.
I’m hoping that it was just luck and not because I love him or something.
i don’t mean to sound promiscuous but he’s not the only boy to ever touch me.
he talks to me about his ex and then wants to come get me and cuddle. I’m totally being used, but I honestly don’t want him to be out of my life.

one night we got pissed and i fondled my friend. i dont know if he remembers but it has been awkward between us lately. i dont want to bring it up incase he tells my friends and some how my brother finds out.

please help me.

As I developed and started getting older it would happen more often and they would make comments about my breasts and body. They would actually tell me how cute I was and compliment my figure. I started to realize that I enjoyed it when they saw me naked or in my bra and panties and that it aroused me. Leaving my bedroom or bathroom door open a few inches helped in letting them see me naked more often. Naturally I never did that when my mother was at home and I know she would be upset if she knew what I was doing.

I can’t help feeling like I do and have even let their friends see me nude many times over the last year or two. I know for sure that 4 of Brads friends and 5 or 6 of Kyles friends have seen me naked. It gets me so excited that I masturbate just thinking about it. Brad even caught me mastubating once, but that was embarrassing because I know he was watching me for a long time and told me so. My step dad saw me naked also two times that I know of but I don’t think he told my mother about it. I really didn’t mean for him to see me though. I like when the boys see me but don’t want my stepdad or mother to know what I’m doing.

I’ve never had a girl before, maybe because I’m a little shy and I never asked a girl out… but the problem is that I love this girl, I’ve done so much for her but she will never see me as more than a friend… we always talk about things that we do not tell anyone else. We trust each other. She says that, if she could chose whom to love, she would chose me.

But the thing is that she always chooses guys that don’t give a shit about her feelings, and then she comes crying to me, because they always hurt her….. I can’t understand why she prefers those guys over me…. I always care about her.. I would never hurt her! I want her so much!

Next year she will go to the university and we won’t see each other so often. She will meet someone there and will never love me…….
I can’t think about other girls…. There are some girls interested on me, but I can’t love other girls……

The girl I love is not perfect, she’s not the best one in my school, but i would never want anybody else…. I just want her!

I’m afraid that I am wasting my time and she will never love me. I’m tired of being the best friend, or the “just friend” and being rejected as a lover….. I’m tired……

I’m just a pathetic guy, crying over a girl that doesn’t realize how much I love her and how I would always give my best to make her happy…….

I personally think we need to stop but we always go back to the same routine and I know for a fact that we both picture it in our heads. I even pictured us naked and in each others arms, calling each other a whore and bitch.

I think it comes from when I was in 5th grade. Me and my friends in my apartment building (male and female) would always play truth or dare. One day I was dared to show all the girls my penis. They all INSTANTLY started to laugh at me. Now to this day I look down at myself thinking my penis is not big enough.

I promised my mum that i wouldn’t hurt him, that i’d just turn him into a “friend” and not hurt him. I couldn’t tell her how much i DONT want to be his friend. how much i WANT to hurt him. the only thing stopping me is that i still like being around his family. and i don’t have the courage. he’s still in love with me. and after he comes back from holidays he’ll be like “wtf? what changed?”

Well I changed. I’m sick to death of him and i want to scream at the idea of him touching me ever again. I can’t take it anymore. he does it one more time and i swear to god i will blow my brains out.

We drank a little and was watching ‘Face Off” she asked if i fantasizes Travolta the hero in the movie fucking me. I was shocked. never had thought of such things.She said she did fantasized a few heros fucking her. The topic got hotter and bolder. She also wanted to know that after sex with my husband did i secretly masturbated….. I was shocked but …i was guilty i had done it once or twice but it was my little secret…still i said no to her.I was little horny with the talk..a little shocked as i had not expected this and a little scared as i was never into such situation.

we were talking sex and we kept in sharing a few experiences…as long as it is talking it went on suddenly she took out her vibrator… it was crossing the limits but i was curious to know more I had used it once but it was too noisy and i was scared so i threw it away…but that was almost ten years ago…she came up to me and kissed me…. to make it short i was seduced by my female friend. I had never been with female I was starting to like it the touched were different to that of my husbands and when she licked me…i was on the virge of screaming….it did not end here. She brought a strapon and fucked me. I did not know where my mind was……. did i think of my hubby… She asked me to turn around and i obeyed it… I came three times continuous…. Afterwards she asked me to do her but i politely refused saying i was too tired and went to sleep. She masturbated herself.

I was guilty of cheating my hubby..but I was more guilty for secretly enjoying the whole fuck I was also guilty of not pleasing her after i got the pleasure.

BTW this is like my best friend, and i feel really really guilty for it

I lost! Could not believe it! Surely he would not make me go through with it, would he? He whistled for Rex and my heart went into my throat. I protested and he laughed, a bet is a bet.

Well this dog has a monster dick, and I figured, let me get it over with – besides, I knew my buddy would not tell anyone. I knew things about him, that he would not want to be known. So I got under Rex and put the dogs dick in my mouth and started sucking. That damn thing got bigger and I liked to gag. As Rex is humping my mouth, my buddy’s wife walks into the room and freaks out! She was supposed to be out of town. “What the hell is going on?” I am sick I am so embarrased.

Well she has agreed to keep it a secret, but now when I go over, I have to strip naked and suck the dog. She watches and cheers me on. I am kinda getting used to it and look forward to my visits. Except, the last time I was there, she said the next time I come by, she wants Rex to fuck me.

I don’t know – that dog does have a big dick!!!

He always commented on how he loved my breasts because they’re 36Ds and his wife’s are barely filling an “A” cup but she is BEAUTIFUL, inside and out. Well one time I was over to their home. He was not there, at first. Her mother called, needing a ride to pick up a prescription. My friend asked me to stay at her home while her newborn was sleeping. I agreed. I thought the perverted JERKWAD wouldn’t be home any time soon because he’s always out, fucking anything with a pussy. Well, he unlocks the front door, comes into the den and looks at me all surprised. He noticed that his wife’s car was not there so he asked me where she was. I told him that she left to take her mom somewhere. He comes over to me, really close and says, “oh so we’re all alone now!” He grabs at my shirt and sort of yanks it down, exposing my breasts. He sorta lets out this moan and tries to bury his face between them. I pushed him away, called him every cussword I knew and tried to ease past him. I thought my words would piss him off and he’d leave me alone.

WRONG. Turned him on even more. He grabs at me and slams me so hard to the floor that the wind was knocked out of me. He straddles me, bends down and starts licking all on my neck. I was terrified and begged him to stop and reminded him that his baby was in the other room asleep. His exact words were, “I’m trying to make a baby with you!” He raises my shirt above my head, pulls my bra up to the collar bone and starts suckling my breasts. This guy is muscular and tall and VERY strong. I always thought when women said they couldn’t get someone off of them they weren’t trying hard enough. Now I understand. Anyway, I prayed for my friend to walk in and catch him in the act. She didn’t. He raped me that night, violently. His penis was so huge…my god how do women handle that? I felt like he was ripping me apart. And he moaned and moaned and commented on how tight my “snapper” was and how he fantasized about doing this to me. I mean he actually was enjoying himself while I cried, pleaded and begged for him to stop. It made me sick. I wish he would hurry up but he didn’t. He took his time and he ejaculated inside of me and when he did, he tried to put all of himself inside of me, which (later on finding out) did something to my cervix and I believe tilted my uterus. I wanted to die right there. I was so sore and hurt that I thought I would die.

I didn’t know what to do. When he was finished, he said that if I thought of telling I might as well forget about it because she’d never believe me, which was true. He can do no wrong in her eyes.

I wondered where she was at and secretly blamed this on her. Why the hell would it take so long to go to Walgreens???!!!!!! I wasn’t there when she came back. As soon as he got off of me and I put my tattered clothing back on, I was out of there.

When I walked out of that house, I could feel his semen seeping out of me and into my panties. Makes me sick just thinking about it. I didn’t end up pregnant and thank god for no STDs but mentally and emotionally I am totally fucked up. When I got home I took a shower, I know I shouldn’t have but I had no intention on reporting it. I noticed that I had some blood in my panties along with some semen. My neck had purplish blotches on it, which were hickeys. My nipples were raw from him sucking them so hard. My stomach was cramped up and I bled all night. I went to the doctor the next day. She asked me if I had been assaulted because of how my cervix looked but I denied it. I just wanted it to all go away. But it hasn’t!

My friend did call me the next day and asked why I left and I simply said I left because he came home. I’ve been trying to forget this but I can’t because he still harrasses me and still says lewd things. I want it to stop!!!! He has ruined my life. I no longer have a boyfriend and I don’t want to have sex ever again.

I have all but stopped going over to my friend’s house because he’s there and he still harrasses me. I have changed my home number and cell many times but he always manages to find it. Why can’t this idiot just leave me alone? Why mess with me?

Im not kiddin………