Comments on: I was abused by my boyfriend…. http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/ When you must confess! Mon, 25 Jul 2011 18:20:45 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: rough unicorn http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6594 rough unicorn Mon, 21 Sep 2009 08:02:36 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6594 was it Torian!? was it Torian!?

]]> By: white daughter http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6516 white daughter Thu, 10 Sep 2009 20:48:48 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6516 forget about him. concentrate on your new relationship and chalk the old relationship up as what not to do. forget about him. concentrate on your new relationship and chalk the old relationship up as what not to do.

]]> By: Peace. http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6346 Peace. Tue, 25 Aug 2009 23:21:22 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6346 Rule number one. Forgive yourself. I'm a 35 year old 6 foot plus guy with a really high IQ. I'm talented, strong clever and well liked. I never believed I could be abused but it happened. My partner destroyed me, cut me to ribbons over two years, using my own tiny doubts and insecurities against me, building them up against me. It's taken me 3 years since I managed to walk away from them and I've still not recovered completely. But I have come a long long way and everything makes so much more sense now. Give yourself time and space and love. No one deserves abuse and it can happen to anyone. And it's your very strength that is used against you: The stronger you are the harder it is to break free. Give yourself space and time and don't listen to idiots who say otherwise, people who have never experienced this sort of stuff have no conception or what it really feels like. Pity them. As for sexual experimentation: Doesn't matter who it is, love is love, lust is lust and abuse is abuse. Strive for the first, recognise and accept the second and walk away from the third. Its all any of us can do. Rule number one. Forgive yourself. I’m a 35 year old 6 foot plus guy with a really high IQ. I’m talented, strong clever and well liked. I never believed I could be abused but it happened. My partner destroyed me, cut me to ribbons over two years, using my own tiny doubts and insecurities against me, building them up against me. It’s taken me 3 years since I managed to walk away from them and I’ve still not recovered completely. But I have come a long long way and everything makes so much more sense now. Give yourself time and space and love. No one deserves abuse and it can happen to anyone. And it’s your very strength that is used against you: The stronger you are the harder it is to break free. Give yourself space and time and don’t listen to idiots who say otherwise, people who have never experienced this sort of stuff have no conception or what it really feels like. Pity them. As for sexual experimentation: Doesn’t matter who it is, love is love, lust is lust and abuse is abuse. Strive for the first, recognise and accept the second and walk away from the third. Its all any of us can do.

]]> By: Jayse http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6330 Jayse Fri, 21 Aug 2009 17:58:46 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6330 Hey i read your story and I had a very similar situation, I just wish i could talk to you about it because i have been able to move past it and work through it and my life is great now that i have moved on. I know you are gonna be able to do the same you just need the tools and motivation to do it. trust me it's not as hard as you think. there are still great guys like us out there. Hey i read your story and I had a very similar situation, I just wish i could talk to you about it because i have been able to move past it and work through it and my life is great now that i have moved on. I know you are gonna be able to do the same you just need the tools and motivation to do it. trust me it’s not as hard as you think. there are still great guys like us out there.

]]> By: successful dragon http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6307 successful dragon Sun, 16 Aug 2009 06:28:16 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6307 No, you deserve it for keeping him a secret. No, you deserve it for keeping him a secret.

]]> By: Freedom http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6098 Freedom Fri, 03 Jul 2009 07:41:43 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6098 No, you are not a strong man. You are bound by your sexual experimentations. No, you did do wrong. If you would put down the mental auto-defense mechanisms you use to avoid the truth, you could come to realize and accept that you are bound by this deception. It is a lie, and you don't have to live like this. Read your own words. A therapist might not be the best answer. No, you are not a strong man. You are bound by your sexual experimentations. No, you did do wrong. If you would put down the mental auto-defense mechanisms you use to avoid the truth, you could come to realize and accept that you are bound by this deception. It is a lie, and you don’t have to live like this. Read your own words. A therapist might not be the best answer.

]]> By: Nice guys get hurt http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6096 Nice guys get hurt Thu, 02 Jul 2009 03:19:08 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6096 Thank you, it felt really good to hear that. Thank you, it felt really good to hear that.

]]> By: Cherry http://confessionpoint.com/i-was-abused-by-my-boyfriend/comment-page-1/#comment-6090 Cherry Tue, 30 Jun 2009 20:35:33 +0000 http://confessionpoint.com/?p=2758#comment-6090 Nice Guy, I agree with your mom. What you have been through is very traumatic, no one deserves that type of treatment, NO ONE! I think what you are feeling is shame because of your sexual orientation- and you shouldn't; I am also bi-sexual but I am a woman- I know how hard it is for bi-sexual men to come out and date men and women simultaneously; we live in a homophobic society and there is a stigma on being a gay/bisexual man: I'm pretty sure you know this. Your ex boyfriend emotionally/physically abused you and even though you want to put it behind you- you were a victim of abuse. I understand why you probably didn't want to tell the authorities because you were afraid of being stigmatized, however, you were a victim of a crime: physical assault/battery. If you chose not to do anything legally about this- please go talk to a professional counselor/therapist; just being able to talk to someone about the situation and allowing them to listen actively, help you sort through your feelings and give you solutions I feel will help you in the long run. I'm glad you found someone who treats you well but to just block it out of your mind like it didn't even happen is not good either. Just remember that you did not do anything wrong here- you trusted him and he betrayed you with his abusiveness and emotional manipulation. You are strong man, not just physically but mentally and your perpetrator is the one who is weak and insecure taking advantage of your vulnerabilities. I hope you read this and think about my advice. Take care of yourself. Nice Guy, I agree with your mom. What you have been through is very traumatic, no one deserves that type of treatment, NO ONE! I think what you are feeling is shame because of your sexual orientation- and you shouldn’t; I am also bi-sexual but I am a woman- I know how hard it is for bi-sexual men to come out and date men and women simultaneously; we live in a homophobic society and there is a stigma on being a gay/bisexual man: I’m pretty sure you know this.

Your ex boyfriend emotionally/physically abused you and even though you want to put it behind you- you were a victim of abuse. I understand why you probably didn’t want to tell the authorities because you were afraid of being stigmatized, however, you were a victim of a crime: physical assault/battery. If you chose not to do anything legally about this- please go talk to a professional counselor/therapist; just being able to talk to someone about the situation and allowing them to listen actively, help you sort through your feelings and give you solutions I feel will help you in the long run.

I’m glad you found someone who treats you well but to just block it out of your mind like it didn’t even happen is not good either. Just remember that you did not do anything wrong here- you trusted him and he betrayed you with his abusiveness and emotional manipulation. You are strong man, not just physically but mentally and your perpetrator is the one who is weak and insecure taking advantage of your vulnerabilities. I hope you read this and think about my advice. Take care of yourself.

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